For a year, one daughter we interviewed flew home for her mother's cancer appointments. Then she changed jobs and moved back.
She was managing a team at a technology company in Silicon Valley when her mother's cancer returned. Her mother lived in Arcadia and went to City of Hope each month. She spoke English and could get to appointments on her own. But difficult medical news was hard to hear alone. The daughter's father had died years before, and the two women had little family in Los Angeles.

This was before remote work was common. Her company let her work from Los Angeles one day a month. The arrangement still left her tired from the travel, distracted at work, and guilty each time she left her mother.
“I think it was really hard to be half in, half out.”
After about a year, she found a job in Los Angeles and moved home. Her mother lived with stage four cancer for seven or eight years. She helped manage appointments and treatments while carrying much of the emotional load. When her mother's care shifted to hospice, they chose to receive it at home. She had to learn what that meant as they went.





